A PHRASE Is Worth a Thousand Words

Ahhhh, yes indeed. It is that time of year again. We are gearing up for the Presidential election bullshit I mean campaigns. And in honor of that special time of forthrightness, I give you a few of my suggestions for possible candidates' campaign slogans. Now, some of these people may not run this time around, but like Rocky, they will surely rise up for that final bout at some point. And by "final", I mean, "God help us".

1. Sam Brownback: Vote for the Skidmark
2. Hillary Clinton: I'm In and I'm In to Win, Though the South Hates Me and I Hope You Forgot Whitewater and So What I Let You Down on the War and Obama Who?
3. Rudy Giuliani: Taking Care of the Terrorists Like I Took Care of Donna
4. John Edwards: Rockin'the House at Riverside and Beyond...Uh, Yo.
5. Al Gore: It's Gettin' Hot in Here So Take Off All Your Clothes for Global Warmin'!
6. John Kerry: Eat More Ketchup So I Have Something to Fall Back On
7. Jeb Bush: What's a Slogan?
8. Barack Obama: Only Slightly Overwhelmed in 2008
4. John McCain: First the Cong; Then the Dong!

Oh, I can't wait to see the commercials!


Tara Parks's picture

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President Bush, like the Republicans following him today and even some Democrats...had no grasp of the new threats we faced, so he failed to offer a vision to keep us safe in a world that had changed...instead, George Bush literally gave us his father's war--but without his father's allies or his father's sense of decency.


— Senator John Edwards, at Pace University, 9/7/07


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