What better way to say mom, "I Love You", than to tell her she is a fat and ugly troll that needs to be nipped and tucked if she ever wants her kids to not walk in shame next to her or for her husband to bang the teenage bagger at the Stop 'N Shop.

What: The hot gift this Mother's Day is not a Macy's gift, but gift certificates for enhancements and/or procedures at a plastic surgeon's office.

Daughters and sons want their mothers to recapture the Fountain of Youth and to look like the hot models and actresses that grace magazine covers. In addition to breast augmentations and enhancements, families are vying for their mothers to get microdermabrasions, facial peels, Botox injections and cellulite reductions.

Who: Dr. Stephen Greenberg, one of the leading doctors in the NYC area, is selling a record number of gift certificates to husbands and children for their loved one. Next month, he will be one of the first doctors in the region to offer the new miracle treatment PERLANE (R) that effectively reduces facial fold and wrinkles in a non-invasive procedure. Dr. Greenberg is available for interviews and can also demonstrate the procedures that mothers want in time for their big day. CONTACT: BRUCE LYNN (516) 827-7773

Source: Dr. Stephen Greenberg

Un-effing-believable.

This guy is out in Long Island so that may explain some of the shameless cheerleading of body dysmorphia.