Legislation So Dumb It Removes All Doubt

If ever a bill needed a thoughtful veto. . .

I know how to make a plural form from a proper noun than ends in “s” like say, Jess or Missus.

. . .or ARKANSAS!

Put the apostrophe after the “s” and you’re done. And if you don’t have a clue or aren’t completely sure, don’t go around telling people you are, much less legislating that they do it your way. And then people won’t think you dumb. How hard is that?

This goes for academics, not just lawmakers. Think through your own case before you go setting standards for the whole population. Otherwise you might make apple-arkansauce of the whole mess. Or maybe this prescriptive English professor's argument is just too subtle for me (?)

Apostrophes will disappear because
1) We read and write less now, AND
2) We read and write more now.

The apostrophe may be disappearing in part because students increasingly learn by hearing, rather than by reading and seeing words, and many people communicate electronically, Slattery suggested.

“The culture is more aural than in the past,” Slattery said. “Conventions are evolving for communicating electronically. For many people using e-mail, there is a sense that prose doesn’t have to be technically correct. It’s especially difficult with instant messaging to proofread and to write in standard usage.”

(And the recommended response to this muddled state of affairs then, is to LEGISLATE not only the apostrophe but writing an extra letter after it??)

France has a whole national ministry to “protect” the language from misuse, mockery and general erosion of crispness and correctness. It even approves or disallows names for babies! Hasn’t made them look any smarter than we are, in all our riotous regional differences. In fact, I think it makes France look pretty silly.

In fact, since the good professor brought up email, France tried to legislate away the word "email" as not suitably French, back in 2003. (Wonder if it worked?)

As Jamey Keaton, Associated Press reported:
PARIS - Goodbye "e-mail," the French government says, and hello "courriel" - the term that linguistically sensitive France is now using to refer to electronic mail in official documents.

The Culture Ministry has announced a ban on the use of "e-mail" in all government ministries, documents, publications or Web sites, the latest step to stem an incursion of English words into the French lexicon.

Dumb. But it does have a certain flair (je ne sais quoi?) and it's smarter than this. If Arkansans just HAD to legislate it, at least they could’ve gotten it RIGHT!

Education historian Diane Ravitch wrote,"The widespread censorship of language and ideas in education caused by the demands of advocacy groups will not end unless it is regularly exposed to public review and ridicule. The next time . . .perhaps someone in the room will say, "Wait, if we do that, people will laugh at us."

I still may not want it legislated, but that's an idea I'm all for. (yes, I DID end that sentence with a prep-- oh never mind.)

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