Martin Luther King Day

(UPDATE by Liza: Chris Chinn has claimed this text as the work of his genius. You can find the whole post at LiveJournal.)

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Yesterday I posted Part 1 of The Art of Defending Racism. Fitting for a Martin Luther King day discussion, here is its concluding section.

The Art of Defending Racism : Advanced Tactics!

The Russian Retreat (Be like Water)
Naturally, anyone who attempts to call you on a racist behavior, will probably try to also refute your defense. Fortunately for you, when your defense isn't based on actual reasons, but simply irrationality, you can switch tactics on the drop of a dime without any explanation.

Simply switch from one defense to another, randomly, and let your opponent continue to wear themselves out trying to penetrate your happy wall of racist belief!

For additional fun, you can switch to a tactic you've used previously. Half of them will not even notice they've been led in a circle, the other half will lose all hope and give up! Hurrah for ignorance!

The Wall of Whiteness
As the Greeks knew, the key to a good defense was teamwork. If you have more than one person supporting racism involved in the conversation, then all of you should use different tactics simultaneously --your opponent will have to fight on multiple fronts, and have to keep switching his or her train of thought to meet each defense. They'll wear out in no time, and, you can reinforce and protect each other's 3 beliefs.