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Emperor Bloomberg attends Debutante Ball without clothes.

Mayor Michael Bloomberg used his first public appearance since announcing switching from the Republican Party to being an independent, a press conference celebrating the alleged success of his 311 program, to showcase his policy creativity to the media. Bloomberg’s aware that his leaving the Republican Party would confirm to the media, his current constituents and potential presidential voters, that he’s pursuing an independent Presidential candidacy, despite saying wink, wink, I’m not running, and knew the world be watching his first appearance after making public his official political independence. This is why Bloomberg is using a press conference honoring 311, a program that he is particularly but unjustifiably proud of, as the location of his personal Presidential Debutante Ball. Bloomberg hoped touting 311 success would perpetuate the myth that he’s a non-partisan problem solver. But the emperor has no clothes. 311 is useless.